 A brief warning: if you are not up to date with the show, having watched season eight, episode fi—aww seven hells, does it even matter at this point? I’m not boasting, but I did get a fair amount of predictions right last week. (Though they were fairly easy to peg as we get closer to the end). I predicted Dany would become the Mad Queen and torch King’s Landing, and though I did not predict the correct manner of death, I did predict the deaths of Euron, Qyburn, The Mountain, The Hound, Jaime, Cersei, and Varys. I also predicted they would bring the show back to Winterfell for the final episode, as Arya would escape the ruins of King’s Landing to let Sansa know the Mad Queen is coming for her. So I did get some things right, amid the morass of things I got wrong. I invite you to read last week’s blog post here. I hope it’s at least entertaining if not clairvoyant. • • • But moving forward and setting our sights on the series finale, I find myself pondering the epic amount of disappointment this season has wrought. I have my own opinions, of course, but I’ve also talked to a fair amount of GoT viewers and have yet to find someone who thinks the writers have been hitting home runs all season long. People are disappointed with the ending. It’s moving from opinion to fact as fast as Daenerys Targaryen turning from Breaker of Chains to Murderer of Children. I mean, we all knew it wasn’t going to be a happy ending.  But did we think we were going to be left unsatisfied? I can’t say that I did. Mother of Dragons fans were prepared for their heroine’s death, but were they prepared for her story arc to be far less than heroic, and logically problematic. Tyrion Lannister fans thought they would see their man go out as the “god of tits and wine,” not as the biggest fool in all of Westeros. We wanted to see Jaime dead, but redeemed. We wanted to see Cersei dead, but through Stark vengeance. We wanted another Red Wedding. We wanted Joffrey’s poisoning. What we are getting this season can only be described as limp. Quick side note: I’m not advocating for the happy ending. I’m comfortable with “things going wrong” such as the idea of Daenerys breaking bad. But it needs to be earned, and feel organic. With a shortened last season, and so much to tie up, they were never going to have enough time for added character building. They needed to lean on the character arcs of past seasons, so unfortunately Dany going cray-cray just doesn’t make sense. She’s been alone in the past; she’s lost loved ones in the past, yet she still maintained her cool, and her purpose. I mean we just watched her torch a city full of kids and innocent people because she couldn’t get laid. WTF? It was highly out of character, and I’m sorry, but that’s just lazy storytelling. Think of your favorite character, large or small, and tell me you’ve been satisfied with their story this season. There are a few, sure, but mostly you can’t. From the Night King down to Ghost we wanted more. From Varys to Cersei we expected greater intrigue. From Jaime to Jon Snow we just wanted it all to have more gravity. So I’m left to wonder. Is this incompetence? Are the show writers mailing it in? Is this just what happens when there are too many egos, too much money, and not enough time? OR is disappointment the intended theme. Maybe the existential battle we wanted was the Night King versus the living, but the existential battle we’re getting is our heroes versus the inevitability of failure. So that is the theme I’m going to use for predicting episode six. Disappointment and the inevitability of failure. We wanted Jaime dead, but also wanted him to stand as proof that people can change. Except what we got was a reminder that change is hard, and more often than not people don’t change. More often than not an arrogant, callous, incestuous prick is just that and nothing more. Jaime doesn’t learn from his mistakes and make a life with Brienne, he tucks tail and runs back to his sister to be buried under the mess his family made. It’s depressing… but that’s Game of Thrones. Here’s my predictions: Tormund Giantsbane, Yara Greyjoy, Samwell Tarly, Gilly, Little Sam, Ghost and Nymeria – These characters are actually just gone. They won’t pop back up for the final episode to play some important part in defending Winterfell. We won’t get to see what’s going on with their new lives. It’s just done, because sometimes people leave and there is no closure. Sometimes people just go, and it’s awkward or depressing. Sometimes Jon doesn’t pet his dog goodbye, and it just ends that way. Stop crying! There’s no crying in Game of Thrones! Just stare off into the void and do nothing under the unbearable weight of existence like the rest of us… Podrick Payne – Oh he’ll get like thirty seconds of camera time, standing behind Brienne or something, and that will literally be all he does. Because Game of Thrones wants to remind the try-hards of the world that no one actually cares. Bran Stark – Speaking of doing next to nothing, that’ll be what Bran does too. He’ll probably just crawl into a hole under the Weirwood tree in Winterfell, get all comfy in the roots, and spend a generation seeing the world through other people’s eyes. Bran is that one friend you had in high school who was a really smart kid with a bright future, then smoked weed one time and it was over. That kid turned into a burn out, forever lost in a cloud of smoke, talking about weird shit like three-eyed ravens. Someone get Bran a bag of Cheetos for episode six. Greyworm – is going to commit suicide amid the ashes of King’s Landing. This will be the intro scene for the episode. Good times. Davos Seaworth – Davos will be the misplaced coffee cup in episode six. He won’t even be in costume. He’ll just show up in jeans and crocs, throwing out modern jargon like YOLO and resting bitch face (that’s for Daenerys). Jon Snow will laugh like he knows EXACTLY what his man Davos is talking about. Drogon – Dany will inexplicably fly her dragon into the outer wall of Winterfell for some totally illogical reason like she saw Sansa glaring at her, and it just made her lose her mind. Because we all know, when Game of Thrones needs to get rid of the fantasy element of a show, they do so quickly and without any logical reason at all. Can I get a ‘hell yeah’ from the children of the forest? Brienne – is actually going to die from shyness. Tyrion Lannister – is going to get stabbed in the heart by a prostitute. Sansa Stark – is going to stay alive forever just so she can tell everyone she meets “I tooold Jon not to trust her,” and “no I don’t feel sorry for him, he’s stuuupid.” And she’ll say it all in that Sansa Stark voice that sounds like what you’d imagine an eye-roll to sound like if an eye-roll had a voice. She will also do a lot of cross stitching. Gendry and Arya Stark – Arya will hunt down Gendry and try to accept his marriage proposal, because for some reason she inexplicably decided there’s more to life than killing people, even though her character has literally never had one on camera moment of thinking that way, but you know, the Hound said some shit so everything changed. Then Gendry will rip off his face to reveal Jaqen H’ghar, (no I’m not letting this prediction die) who will kill Arya for the many-faced god, because even in our fantasy fiction there will always be assholes killing people for no reason because some god "told" them to. Jon Snow – will do nothing important or intelligent or heroic in episode six. His destiny will be to travel north of the wall and build cabins for underprivileged wildling youth. No one will ever see him again, but he will die one day in an avalanche caused by a dire wolf. Daenerys Targaryen – In the final episode of the series Daenerys will continue losing things, because that’s what she does. She’ll lose her army, lose her dragon, lose her alliance with anyone in Westeros, and continue to lose her mind. She will then be kidnapped and dropped off the side of a boat in a bundle of chains she will be ironically unable to break. And who will do the kidnapping? Bronn of the Blackwater – The final scene of Game of Thrones will be Bronn walking into the deserted former home of the Umbers, Last Hearth. You remember, the place the Night King tacked that dead kid to the wall in a spiral of body parts? Turns out Sansa gave it to Bronn in exchange for the kidnap and murder of the Mad Queen. Bronn will stroll in, arm in arm with some former brothel worker, and sit down in a big chair. He’ll pour himself some wine, raise a glass and then look at the woman. “Don’t look so fucking disappointed,” he’ll say. “I’ve waited a long time for this.” Thanks for reading, Dylan Lee Peters 
0 Comments
 A brief warning: if you are not up to date with the show, having watched season eight, episode four, you probably shouldn’t read on. Last week’s episode brought an end to poor Rhaegal, as well as Missandei. Unfortunately for me, I predicted neither of those events. However, some ideas I wrote about last week are still alive and kicking. Though I may be a fool for it, I’m not giving up on them. I pegged the long-awaited Cleganebowl for episode five, and that event is still on the table (and seems more likely with every passing minute of screen time). I also argued there would have to be a group of characters that survived the show, and with the presumed departures of Sam, Gilly, and Tormund, I have three predictions, at this moment, in my favor. I also had a prediction for Bronn and Brienne that did not play out in episode four, but still has a chance to play out in episode five. That also goes for my bold prediction for Arya, which seems more likely for episode six now. I invite you to read last week’s blog post here. • • • But now we’re getting down to the nitty-gritty. Only two episodes left. Episode four spent its run-time attempting to turn Daenerys Targaryen into the “Mad Queen,” and very well might have succeeded. She was left without another of her children (she is now just the Mother of Dragon), without her best friend (Jorah), without her most trustworthy ally (Missandei), and her relationship with Jon Snow (and everyone is Westeros, for that matter) is about to go from awkward, to downright homicidal. Poor Emilia Clarke must have had a massive headache after filming, as it looked like she was trying to make her own head explode in each and every scene.  Episode five is shaping up to be a music video for Five Finger Death Punch’s “Burn It Down” starring Daenerys Targaryen and Drogon. (I won’t type the lyrics here, as they are rather profane, but it’s a heavy metal song about burning everything to the ground, so… yeah, you get it). So I’m grouping my predictions into larger categories for this week, and the first is what I’m going to call… The King’s Landing Inferno: Dany and Drogon are going to have a Southern Bar-B-Q and a lot of innocent people are going to burn. In fact, I’m not sure King’s Landing or the Iron Throne will even be around once it is all done with. Unhappy with how dark episode three was? Well, you might have to turn the brightness down on this one. First to the flame? I’m picking Euron Greyjoy for death by Drogon. This seems like a simple enough revenge sequence. He killed Rhaegal, after all. I’d also throw Qyburn in here as next to get torched. Why, you ask? Frankly, because I don’t know why he’s still around, and Dany needs kindling for her fire. I expect both these characters to die early on amid the burning of the city, ultimately setting up King’s Landing as the flaming backdrop for the rest of the episode. Now that we have our fiery city, it’s time for Arya and The Hound to reach King’s Landing and hunt down Cersei. I had thought it would be poetic if Sansa were the one to kill Cersei, but things don’t seem to be shaping up that way. Arya is going to make an attempt, even if she’s not successful. The Mountain will be protecting Cersei and it will be up to the Hound to dispatch him. I believe he will succeed, but in doing so suffer an excruciating and inevitably fatal blow. This will give Arya a second opportunity to put the Hound down. This time she will be merciful and kill Sandor Clegane. The Hound Kills the Mountain, and then Arya gives the Hound a merciful death. Enter Jaime Lannister. Cersei will look to Jaime for protection from Arya, but Jaime will turn his back on his sister, and instead the Captain of the Golden Company will come to Cersei’s aide just before Arya can reach her. Fighting ensues, but only as a means to change scenes. Cersei can’t die just yet. Moving on, I believe Jaime Lannister only said what he said to Brienne in episode four to keep her from following him to King’s Landing. I don’t think he really meant it. I think Brienne will ultimately come to that conclusion, as well, and come looking for Jaime. Here is where I think my prediction from last week will come into play. Cersei will find Bronn and expect his protection. Bronn will play his Highgarden hand, as discussed with the Brothers Lannister, and want to know just why he should protect her. If Cersei knows Euron has been killed, she will be able to offer Bronn the greatest reward anyone could: If we win, I’ll marry you. You’ll be a king. Cersei will be desperate and mostly unhinged at this point, so nothing is off the table. So, Bronn and Cersei will find Jaime just after a reunion with Brienne. Then, Bronn will take his shot, Brienne will step in the way and tragically die in Jaime’s arms. Bronn and Jaime will then fight, and Jaime will win, but sneaking up behind will be sister, and… Cersei will be the only one to exit this scene after slicing her brother’s throat. Meanwhile, Arya, Jon, and Greyworm fight through the Golden Company giving Dany passage to find Cersei for a final showdown. Here, I expect Cersei to do something shocking in front of Daenerys, and I think it will be to reveal her double-agent as… (buh-buh-buh-boom) VARYS. There has to be a reason why Euron and Cersei have always seemed to be in the right place at the right time. Whether it’s taking Yara Greyjoy, or Killing Rhaegal, or allowing the Unsullied to take Casterly Rock while the real army slips into Highgarden. Cersei has been making all the right moves for a while, with seemingly little info to go on. We’ve heard time and time again that Varys works for the Realm, and if he has always had doubts about Daenerys, he may have been playing Cersei and the Dragon Queen against each other for the benefit of the Realm. Cersei will reveal Varys, and reveal that she knows about Jon’s parentage, and this will bring the “Mad Queen” to the forefront. Daenerys will fry Cersei, and then she will begin tracing the whispers back. Varys got his info about Jon from Tyrion, who got it from Sansa, who obviously got it from Jon. The Mad Queen will turn her fire on Varys, and then on Tyrion. Then, in possibly the most stunning moment of the season, if not the series, Daenerys Targaryen will cook her nephew/lover, Jon Snow. This will all set up the last episode and… Where I’m placing My Gold They will bring the show back to Winterfell for the final episode. Arya will escape the ruins of King’s Landing and let Sansa know the Mad Queen is coming for her. Maybe Samwell, Gilly, Davos, Podrick, Tormund, Ghost, and Yara will have their stories ended through absence, but I just have a hard time believing that. Especially when Bran and Sansa are still away from King’s Landing, and such important characters. The Mad Queen will march what’s left of her army north, the Three-eyed Raven will have a final purpose, Yara will bring the Iron Islanders to the fight, and a Sansa vs. Daenerys showdown will come to pass. Hey, maybe even Ghost and Nymeria will bring a pack of dire wolves into the fray. It might just be the fantasy writer in me, but I’ve had a hard time with the HBO show waving away the supernatural elements of the story so easily. We never learned enough about the Night King, or his connection with the Three-eyed Raven. We never learned enough about the Lord of Light, though it seems he had a heavy hand in the way everything played out. Even the Children of the Forest seem to be oddly absent. I may be pinning for something that will never be addressed, but bringing the story back to Winterfell, and putting Bran at the forefront, could help to tie up a lot of these holes. But… given Game of Thrones’ penchant for pulling the rug out on my assumptions, I’m going to hedge my bet here. Not-so Bold Prediction: George R. R. Martin will have the last laugh. We, fantasy fans, will be forced to wait for his conclusion before we get any sort of satisfying explanation for the “fantasy-heavy” elements of A Song of Ice and Fire. Game of Thrones will serve as the soap opera version of the tale, ever-popular with those interested in person against person dramatics, and political gaming. Those of us who were always on Jon’s side, putting our petty differences aside for the true battle, the profound, existential battle, will have to wait for Mr. Martin’s final book. And he will laugh all the way to the bank. After all, gotta sell those books. Am I right? CLICK HERE NOW to get The Hands of Ruin: Book One by Dylan Lee Peters – FREE for your kindle! Thanks for reading, Dylan Lee Peters   A brief warning: if you are not up to date with the show, having watched season eight, episode three, you probably shouldn’t read on.
So… My predictions took some major losses in last Sunday’s Game of Thrones episode. I had the Night King as a “definitely NOT dying” character, Melisandre as “most likely not dying,” Beric Dondarrion as “can’t die yet,” and I predicted a lot of characters would die that didn’t. My predictions were mostly made under the assumption that the Night King would survive until the final episode and lay waste to Winterfell. Obviously, Arya Stark put all that to bed. I did predict Ed, Theon, and Jorah would meet their ends last Sunday, but honestly… who didn’t see those departures coming? I don’t feel especially proud that I was able to guess those correct. Truly, the premature end of the Night King busted my entire theory about the show, as I’m sure it did for many others. I guess the Night King had served his purpose and the Lord of Light was done with him, just like he was done with ole’ Beric. Speaking of the Lord of Light–it seems the Lord has a heavier hand in how the Game will play out than I previously thought. Melisandre lit the night up like it was a Rob Zombie concert, and her prophecy about Arya played out so smoothly she decided to go out on top and become dust in the wind. Mic drop. Last week’s GoT MVP might have been Melisandre, might have been Arya, but when you think about it, was definitely the Lord of Light. So that’s going to be the theme of this week’s predictions, because it seems the Lord of Light truly has a plan for all in the world of GoT. At least until someone else’s god decides to get in on the fun, anyway. (I’m looking at you Drowned God of the Iron Islands. Can we get a Biblical flood for episode five, please?) Anyway, let’s get on to predicting where the Lord will lay his light. The Lord is Definitely Not Done With: Daenerys Targaryen Jon Snow After pulling the plug on the Night King so early, it feels like these are the only two characters we can definitively say will survive episode four. The Lord is not done with them (more on that in a bit). The Lord is Probably Not Done With: Bran Stark Sansa Stark Cersei Lannister Jaime Lannister The Mountain The Hound I was wrong about Bran. I thought his character, after helping along the Aegon Targaryen reveal, had satisfied his purpose and needed to be removed. But there is something more going on with Bran that we just haven’t seen enough of yet. Hopefully we get more clues in episode four. Here’s an early prediction for episode five: Sansa Stark will be the one who kills Cersei. I believe that is the Lord’s plan for her. The Lannisters are responsible for taking her childhood fantasy and turning it on its head. While it would be heartbreaking if Jaime killed his sister, it would be just and poetic for Sansa to kill her. After all, Cersei is the woman who is more or less responsible for making Sansa the hardened woman she is now. It all goes back to Cersei. If Jaime has any role in his sister’s death, I believe it will be through inaction rather than action. The things he has “done for love” have defined his character, but his final act will be about what he refuses to do going forward, namely, kill for Cersei. Cersei will look to Jaime as her last line of defense, and he will not be there for her. While all of this could happen in episode four, it feels much more like episode five fare. I also think episode five will give me the main event I’ve been waiting for… (can you hear them chanting? Two men enter; one man leaves. Two men enter; one man leaves). I give you CLEGANEBOWL!! If Jaime is not there as Cersei’s last line of defense, that means the Mountain will be and he’ll need to be taken down. Unleash the Hound! The Shepard Needs a Flock: Yara Greyjoy Gilly and Little Sam Samwell Tarly Davos Seaworth Varys Tyrion Lannister Greyworm Missandei Podrick Payne Tormund Giantsbane In my original theories for this last season of Game of Thrones I conceived of a story where no one wins, no one lives, the slate is wiped completely. However, if this is all about the Lord’s will, doesn’t our shepherd need a flock? Some people have to survive to move the world forward in the light of the Lord. So he’ll take a little bit of this, a little bit of that, sprinkle in some Unsullied, add a dash of Giantsbane. Shiny happy people holding hands, et cetera, et cetera. I specifically wonder about the group of Tyrion Lannister, Davos Seaworth, and Lord Varys–a new small council, perhaps? Three wise men? (cough, cough). Or maybe the new world will not need a monarch, but an oligarchy? The Lord Should Be Done With: Euron Greyjoy Qyburn These characters seem more than extraneous, at this point. I’d wager some gold on their deaths if I thought they were important enough to care about. They might die, they might not, but I’m not betting either way. And of course that leads me to… Where I’m Placing My Gold (and my faith if we’re talking about gods) Brienne of Tarth Bronn of the Blackwater Bronn was given a directive: kill the Brothers Lannister. I don’t expect him to achieve this goal, but I do expect someone to perish by way of his attempt. I am conjuring a scene where Bronn spies Jamie from a distance, and with crossbow in hand the shot is there for the taking. Alas, just as his finger hits the trigger our favorite mercenary has an affliction of conscience. He jerks the shot just a bit, knowing his shot will graze the one-handed man, and not kill him. Unfortunately, at just that moment, Brienne spies the assassin and dives in front of the crossbow’s bolt. It finds its way into Brienne’s heart, just as she found her way into Jaime’s. Poor Brienne of Tarth will pass from this world in the arms of Jamie Lannister. Bronn will be revealed as the assassin, and before he is executed he’ll spill the beans on Cersei as the hiring hand. Brienne’s death at the hands of Cersei will give Jaime the motivation he needs to let his sister go in spirit and in life. A Shakespearean tragedy unfolds, and sets up Cersei’s demise in episode five. But a good tragedy needs a true shocker. Bold prediction for Episode Four Arya Stark will die at the hands of Jaqen H’ghar while he is using Gendry’s face. (which means Gendry is dead too, because… well… his face will be gone). After all, if the Lord of Light was done with Beric Dondarrion, and he was done with Melisandre, then he is definitely done with Arya Stark. He gave that girl more light than anyone. She got to kill the Night King. That will live in the lore of the land for ages upon ages. Besides, a man needs a name… and a paycheck. The fiery Lord giveth to young Arya and the fiery Lord taketh away. Remember, this dude has a plan. And speaking of that plan… what’s his plan for Jon Snow? After all, Melisandre was very clear that Beric was brought back to fulfill a purpose and be done. Well, Jon was brought back, too. After seasons and seasons of build up, I think a lot of viewers assumed that purpose was to take down the Night King, yet here we are, left with no Night King, and a lot of Snow. If Jon’s purpose wasn’t to come back just for the Night King, who was he brought back for? And more importantly, if the Lord of Light takes you down after you’ve fulfilled your purpose, doesn’t that mean Jon won’t survive the season? Looks like we have more questions than answers, yet again. The Lord is kind of a dick, isn’t he? Thanks for reading, Dylan Lee Peters  It seems my predictions for episode two did not come through. I predicted both Euron Greyjoy and Bran Stark would die, and neither of those characters met their maker (or is it makers?). Euron wasn’t even in the episode. Needless to say, I can claim zero points for last week. However, I’m not giving up on my theories. In fact, the only thing I may have really gotten wrong was the show’s pacing. I expected episode two to be filled with more action given the time crunch for this season. Yet Thrones writers decided to give us one more episode filled with reunions and foreshadowing. So, I’m not admitting defeat on last week’s predictions, I’m going to fold them into this week, add a little salt, maybe some herbs, and throw the pot back on the fire. It’s time for episode three predictions. A brief warning: if you are not up to date with the show, having watched season eight, episode two, you probably shouldn’t read on. Definitely NOT Dying in Episode Three Daenerys Targaryen Jon Snow Tyrion Lannister Sansa Stark Arya Stark The Night King Cersei Lannister (new addition) Jaime Lannister I probably should have had Jaime in this category last week due to his needing one more dramatic scene with Cersei. I just wasn’t willing to go 100% on his survival, given that Bran could have easily told his family what Jaime did all those years ago, effectively throwing Jaime to the wolves. (See what I did there? Wolves? Starks? Throw him to the wolves. I know, I know. You’re impressed. Let’s move on.) A side note: I’m changing the categories a bit for this week, because the show has made it quite obvious they intend episode three to be a giant battle at Winterfell between the living and the dead. This means certain characters are not likely to die this week purely due to absence. This also means more characters could die than what you might see in a normal episode. With one third of the season in the books, and very little action having taken place (unless of course we’re talking about Arya and Gendry ;) Episode three is set up to be a game-changer. So, for our first category: Most likely not appearing in Episode Three = not dead yet. Melisandre Bronn of the Blackwater The Mountain Qyburn Yara Greyjoy Euron Greyjoy Now, on to the next: Will be at the battle, but just can’t die yet.
Where I’m Placing My Gold Bran Stark will die in episode three. Bran was my prediction for episode two, and nothing has happened to make me change my prediction of HOW he will die. In fact, the events of episode two only served to reinforce my idea that the Night King will kill Bran. I predicted last week that Bran was referring to the Night King when he said he was “waiting for an old friend,” and Bran basically confirmed that theory in episode two by announcing that the Night King always comes for whomever is the three-eyed raven. That was my first reason for thinking Bran would die. My second reason deals with Bran’s ability to essentially see all, and how that ability can ruin a plot line. (Note how Doctor Strange was killed in Infinity War because they couldn’t have him spoiling the Endgame). The third reason I’m predicting Bran to die uses logic I applied to my Euron Greyjoy prediction from last week, and that is Game of Thrones loves to reward arrogance with severe punishment. Using a crippled boy as bait to win a battle is arrogant if not completely reckless, and this is the exact kind of drama GoT thrives upon. Jon using Bran to smoke out the Night King is sure to backfire in the bloodiest of ways, give Jon a reason to doubt his leadership skills, and possibly even a reason to keep his birthright a secret, relinquishing his claim to the throne. Plus, it just feels like every one of our major characters at the Battle of Winterfell should lose someone symbolic of their journey. (More on this in a second). Bold prediction for Episode Three: Everyone loses at the Battle of Winterfell. Whether it’s your life, or the life of a loved one, almost everyone will feel the sting of death.
Episode three promises to be one of the show’s darkest ever. However, I think I’ve found a way to inject a little levity. Try this on for size: The crypt scene begins with pure silence, no screaming, no zombie noises, just silence. We see Davos scramble down into the crypts because he realizes what is about to happen too late. His eyes grow wide as he sees all the dead woman and children, the camera closes up on his face, and then the bass and drums drop from Michael Jackson’s Thriller. The dead begin to rise and dance toward Davos as Vincent Price’s voice echos over Winterfell: “The foulest stench is in the air, The funk of forty thousand years, And grisly ghouls from every tomb, Are closing in to seal your doom. And though you fight to stay alive, Your body starts to shiver, For no mere mortal can resist, The evil of the thriller.” Cut to the Night King cackling, his arms raised in the air, as he stands next to Bran Stark in his chair, his decapitated head lying upon the snowy ground. (END SCENE) (I know, I know. You’re impressed.) Thanks for reading, Dylan Lee Peters   Game of Thrones is back for Season 8 and I, for one, couldn’t be happier. I guess I just wouldn’t know what to do with myself if the night wasn’t dark and full of terrors, as those who have read my novels can attest. It’s once again time to raise a glass of wine, take the black, and cross names off our lists. What else does one need? And speaking of crossing names off our lists, I thought I would share a little prognostication with you. As I tend to do while watching Thrones, I try to predict who will have their names crossed off next. I imagine I’m not alone in this endeavor, so let’s see if our picks match up, shall we? A brief warning: if you are not up to date with the show, having watched season eight, episode one, you probably shouldn’t read on. I think the best way to lay this out, in order to make it less painful, is in categories. You don’t really need to read a paragraph on why I don’t think Jon Snow will die in episode two. It’s all fairly obvious, so let’s get on with it. Definitely NOT Dying This Episode Daenerys Targaryen Jon Snow Tyrion Lannister Sansa Stark Arya Stark The Night King Cersei Lannister These are the main characters, obviously, and their stories can’t end until we are closer to The End. Have they fully served their purpose in the story? Not yet, so probably not dying this episode. Melisandre Brienne of Tarth Jamie Lannister Bronn of the Blackwater The Hound The Mountain We didn’t even see Melisandre or Brienne in episode one. It’s difficult to imagine their first season eight appearance would be their last. Jaime might be considered a main character, though I haven’t placed him there. I do feel that he needs one more scene with his sister, at least, before he’s offed. Bronn was given a mighty task in the first episode, and it’s hard to imagine that plays out completely in episode two. As for the Clegane boys–let’s just say if we don’t get Clegane Bowl this season I might be forced to try my hand at fan fiction for the first time. No clear purpose to this season’s story yet, so an early death would feel cheap. Unlikely to die this episode. Greyworm Missandei Ed Tollet Podrick Payne Gilly Qyburn Tormund Giantsbane Varys Davos Seaworth I don’t really need to say much more than the category title. If any of these characters die from an errant arrow, or a hungry dead man this early on it would just feel so cheap. I suppose something could happen to them within the space of one episode to meet a fitting end, but I’m just not betting on it. Could satisfy their purpose through dying at this point. Might die in episode two. Gendry Yara Greyjoy Theon Greyjoy Jorah Mormont You could sell me on any of these characters dying in episode two:
Have probably satisfied their purpose. Likely to die. Now shit’s getting good. Something episode one gave away is that a major plot line of this season will be the wedge everyone is trying to drive between Jon Snow and Daenerys Targaryen, and our boy Samwell Tarly is just the man to hammer that wedge home. Khaleesi fried his dad and brother and Sam didn’t take that news well. It, in fact, pushed him to tell Jon who his true parents were, and reveal Jon’s birthright to the Iron Throne. I can see a scene where Sam gets pissed at Daenerys, announces to a room of important people that Jon Snow is actually Aegon Targaryen, then Dany cooks our doughboy under Drogon’s broiler, and then Jon has to pull her aside for a private conversation in the kitchen to say, “babe, why are you being such a bitch right now? Sam was my best friend, and I thought you’d be a little cooler about the whole ‘right to throne' thing. Why can’t you ever support my dreams!?” Yet, I will concede that this scene looks better a couple more episodes into the season, so I’m not placing my money on it. Where am I placing my gold?  Where I’m Placing My Gold Euron Greyjoy will die in episode two. If there is anything Games of Thrones has done consistently over the years, it’s to take arrogant men and put their heads on pikes. Euron is just the next in a long line. This wide-eyed weirdo has satisfied his purpose and his libido. He delivered the Golden Company and took his queen to bed. I see Yara marching into the throne room, battling Euron to his knees, and when Mister Mustache looks to his queen for help, she’ll simply shrug and suggest that if the Golden Company had delivered those elephants she so wanted, maybe she would have been more inclined to help. Yara wins, Euron dies… and then the Mountain crushes Yara’s head because I need to see the Mountain crush at least one more head before #CleganeBowl. #TeamHound #TalkersMakeMeThirsty But… I’m not done.  Bold Prediction For Episode Two
Bran Stark will die, and there are two reasons I believe this to be true.
There we have it. I’m picking Euron Greyjoy and Bran Stark to go down in episode two. I’d love to read what you think and see your predictions in the comments. And… I’ve got great news to report on the Everflame: Mystic Wild front. Revising and editing of the manuscript is progressing wonderfully, and I hope to have the novel available in early summer. If you haven’t already, please check out my page dedicated to the new book. It currently has a map, a book blurb, and a cover image. Sample chapters to come! I expect this to be a great adventure for fans of my previous Everflame series, as well as for new readers. You will not have to have read the last series to enjoy this new novel. I promise! Thanks for reading, Dylan Lee Peters  A story my mother often tells involves a porcelain clown and its subsequent demise at the hands of her favorite son. As legend would have it—yes, legend—my two-year-old self decided the clown was an affront to humanity, and smashed it with a baseball before it could infect the world with its evil. It’s not a particularly interesting story, but it comes up whenever conversation turns to clown phobia, which many people admittedly have. I suppose the story serves as a confirmation for those who are afraid of clowns. It’s a parable that verifies—yes, indeed—clowns are inherently evil, even a two-year-old child can see that. A not-so-interesting fact never mentioned in the story’s retelling is that while my two-year-old self was shattering that porcelain clown in 1982, Stephen King was holed up in Bangor, Maine, writing his horror classic “It.” For those who don’t know, “It” is a story about children fighting against an evil entity that has taken the form of a clown. The more I think about that coincidence the creepier it gets. It’s not an earth-shattering coincidence the likes of which would make someone believe in the supernatural and immediately tremble in fear. The fear is subtle; it gnaws at you. It causes that moment of discomfort in the recesses of your brain, and then you begin doubting reality. It’s an unspectacular coincidence, my mind says. Something like it probably happened to tons of kids at that time. It’s a stupid thought... But it IS sort of weird… And then, of course, the overactive imagination takes over. What if King was literally writing at the moment I stopped and turned to look at the porcelain clown? What if it was a particularly grisly scene where a child was being attacked by the big baddie of King’s novel, Pennywise the Clown? What if I stared at the porcelain clown in my bedroom and heard the clack-clack of a distant typewriter just as a chill ran the length of my back? Maybe I grabbed the baseball at that moment for comfort; never letting my eyes leave the motionless porcelain clown, intuition telling me something was wrong. Maybe at that exact second Stephen King was typing the description of Pennywise the Clown reaching toward young Ben Hanscom, while in my bedroom I saw—or thought I saw—the eyes of my porcelain clown move ever so slightly in my direction. Maybe a voice echoed in my head asking me if I wanted a balloon. Maybe it told me I could float. Maybe at that moment the red painted smile of the porcelain clown opened slowly to reveal a row of jagged rotting teeth, and terrified, I threw the baseball as hard as I could, wishing for it all to end. Maybe our imaginations can run away with us sometimes. I recently read Stephen King’s “It,” after wanting to see the new movie, but procrastinating long enough that it had left my local theater. Reading the book seemed a good substitute. I won’t review the book here, as it seems a foolish thing to do more than thirty years after the release of said book. Especially when the book is already considered a classic of its genre. My opinion seems rather inconsequential. I will say this, however: “It” haunts me. I sit and think about why the book haunts me, and it is not just the story, its themes, and concepts I can’t shake. I’m haunted by the real life inception of the book. I’m haunted by the possibilities of what was going on in Stephen King’s head when he wrote “It.” It would take a lot more writing than a simple blog post to really dive into this topic—and frankly, I don’t really want to dive into it—but boiled down to its essence is this: Stephen King wrote a horror book about terrible things happening to a group of eleven-year-old kids (six boys; one girl), and he began writing this book just a few months after his own daughter had turned eleven. Again, his daughter turned eleven, and King spent the next four years writing about terrible things happening to children of her age. He wrote things violent, he wrote things emotional, and he even wrote things sexual. Now, I understand that as writers we very often take inspiration from our own lives to create stories. That is not a new concept by any means. I used my own experience with adopting a rescue dog to fuel the story of “The Dean Machine.” To a large degree, I get it. But I just can’t get past the idea of having an eleven-year-old-daughter and then writing “It.” I suppose if I really think about it, it’s only natural to be afraid that certain things might happen to your daughter. You want to protect her from life and its pitfalls. Your mind might go to some dark places when thinking of the things you want to protect her from, and as a writer you might use your own fears to fuel your work. But in “It,” the thing that terrifies, and abuses the little girl the most isn’t the clown, or even the outside world. The bad guy in her life is her father. It’s as if Stephen King’s greatest fear for his daughter, was what he might do to her. I can’t shake the feeling that Stephen King wrote “It” to scare himself. Like the book is his own personal worst nightmare. I don’t know. I’m probably over thinking all of this. But I guess that’s what I find haunting. The idea that maybe our imaginations can run away with us sometimes. Dylan Lee Peters is the author of the fantasy adventure series "Everflame," the sci-fi fantasy "The Dean Machine," and most recently the epic fantasy series "The Hands of Ruin." I went to see Thor: Ragnarok this weekend with my wife, and I left the theatre sort of disappointed. When my wife asked me if I liked the movie, I sort of shrugged, made some nondescript male grunting noise, and followed that up with, “I thought it was going to be like Guardians of the Galaxy.” (Quick side note: when you type “gua” into Google search, Guardians of the Galaxy is the first thing that comes up. This is a heresy against guacamole I will not stand for). My wife’s obvious but poignant comment was, “It’s a Thor movie, not a Guardians of the Galaxy movie.” … and I guess the truth is I just wanted another Guardians of the Galaxy movie. So why did I go to a Thor movie wanting to see something other than Thor? Why did I expect that? Am I mentally defective? While that last question can certainly be debated, it stands to reason that something caused me to think Thor: Ragnarok might be styled more like a Guardians movie. My only thought while walking out of the theatre was that the “buzz” had gotten to me. Damn it all, shaking a fist at the sky, I fell prey to one of the classic blunders. Inconceivable. We’re all aware of the “buzz.” It’s the separate but not equal bastard child of all modern entertainment. It’s the shadow monster hanging over Hawkins, Indiana. It’s what makes people who don’t like high fantasy watch Game of Thrones. It’s the reason I know who Kendrick Lamar is even though I haven’t listened to rap music since I was in middle school. It’s the reason people who can’t even spell the word government think they know exactly who should be elected to each and every public office in our country. I mean can you imagine if we allowed the masses to elect other positions of societal importance like doctors? Or scientists? The species would be dead in a week… Oh, shit… went off the rails… recalculating...  But the point is that it was the “buzz” around Thor: Ragnarok that had me thinking it would be like a Guardians movie. To be fair, the inclusion of bright cosmic colors in Thor were reminiscent of Guardians, there was a fair amount of comedy in Thor that was not present in the earlier movies, and there were two action sequences that happened while Led Zeppelin’s “Immigrant Song” were blaring from the speakers. And in those moments the movie did seem very Guardians-esque. However, if you’re going to the theatre expecting to see a Thor movie that is a Guardians of the Galaxy movie, like me, you will be disappointed.
Yet, the people who run Marvel Studios did this on purpose. This buzz was not organic. It was purposeful and intended. Thor was not as popular or profitable as Guardians of the Galaxy, so the executives used the power of Guardians to propel Thor. And it worked. The amount of money Marvel Studios made this past weekend is embarrassing. Now those executives are one step closer to replacing their souls with liquid cash. (Ah, the American Dream). All while fools like me forked over their money for something less than. But I’m not complaining. Hell, I’m impressed. Touché, Marvel Studios executives. Because the truth is, we all want to replace our souls with liquid cash. But seriously, all of us who create—whether it be movies, or books, or any product—we all wish we could generate that kind of buzz to drive people to our work. We all wish we could take something that already has power and use it to convince people to consume our goods. People who create are rarely also good sales people. I mean, trying to convince you to consume my goods sounds so dirty, doesn’t it? Alas… I really want you to consume my goods (sigh)… so in homage to Marvel and the American Dream, let’s stir up some buzz for my newest series of novels, The Hands of Ruin. The Hands of Ruin series has a secret family lineage thing, and a mystical force-like power thing just like Star Wars. So if you like Star Wars, you will love The Hands of Ruin! The Hands of Ruin has two teenage kids being forced to live with a crappy family member, and have all sorts of bad stuff happen to them before they find out they have previously unknown powers, just like in Harry Potter. So if you liked Harry Potter, you will absolutely fall in love with The Hands of Ruin! The Hands of Ruin has a badass female character both beautiful and strong who is constantly thrown into horrible situations where she has to fight against the establishment, just like The Hunger Games. If you like The Hunger Games than you are doing yourself an obscene and cruel injustice by not reading The Hands of Ruin! The Hands of Ruin has shocking scenes like Game of Thrones. The Hands of Ruin and Game of Thrones might as well be exactly the same thing except different and not derivative! Do you remember the fantastical things you loved from your childhood? Jim Henson stuff? Transformers stuff? Pokémon stuff? The Hands of Ruin is just like all of those things! Don’t deprive your inner child any longer! Phew… there, I did it… and yes, I feel terribly dirty. But now there’s buzz, so go forth and spread the buzz. And I’ll leave you with this one more shameful and completely tangential connection from something you like to my new book series. I assume you came here because this blog post was about Thor: Ragnarok. I’m assuming you like Thor. Well… The Hands Of Ruin is THOR in acronym. So there! (insert hand gesture) (insert fart noise) (drop mic… walk away… prepare to rule the world after buzz takes hold) • • • Dylan Lee Peters is an unstable individual who has written seven novels all of which you should probably be reading. Actually, remove the probably from that sentence. It’s too wishy-washy. Download book one of The Hands of Ruin series for FREE here. There is a chapter in The Dean Machine where Perkins is injured, and the group is forced to spend prolonged time in the Moda ruins. It is during this time we first hear of Perkins’ favorite music group. • • • Perkins huffed, frustrated with being a burden. The hours were the longest for him. Wendy could leave the room, Echo could leave the room, and even Dean could leave the room, but he was forced to just lie there. He told stories as the only way to keep his mind from plunging itself into madness. Wendy and Echo listened to him all through the day. They understood that he was suffering the most, physically and mentally, so they placated him and listened as he talked about his training at the Vermilion Military Academy, his childhood in the West Heights of the city, anything really; even stories about his affinity for the songs of the Randomkind, a four-member music group that no one else present had ever heard of. • • • Later in that chapter, after Echo and Wendy have an argument, Perkins recites some lyrics from a song to help Echo put the argument into perspective. • • • Wendy turned away from her argument with Echo, mere feet from where Perkins sat, and stormed off into the hut, angry tears streaking her face. Dean followed her, ready to console his friend. Echo watched as she disappeared into the building and threw her arms up in frustration. The woman turned to Perkins as he stared off into the sky. “Can you believe her?” she asked. He turned and looked at her, and then sang some words of a song he knew: “Life is just a picture that can never be framed. You can try if you like, but you’ll end up insane. Nothing’s all right if you’ve never been wrong, I’m gonna take me away on the wings of a phoenix song.” “Is that a song from that weird band you like?” “It is a song from that weird band I like.” “And are those words supposed to mean anything?” “Hell, I don’t know,” Perkins admitted. “They might be drunken ramblings. They might be astute observations—I just like the tune.” • • • Now for the first time, you can hear that tune Perkins liked so much: “Phoenix Song” by The Randomkind. This audio file has been recovered from the remnants of the hive by IONH agents, and transmitted to me from the future. (Yes, I know I’m crazy… just go with it). Enjoy ;)
All of my books take place in the same “universe.” What I mean by that is all of my books take place in and around our earth, but a parallel version. This sounds kind of strange, but it’s a very popular concept used in speculative entertainment (books, TV, and motion picture). The MARVEL cinematic universe is a great example. The adventures of the Avengers take place in and around earth, our earth, albeit a very different version. My books follow this same model, and I’ve provided a visual to help explain that, a sort of timeline.  While the Everflame series, and The Dean Machine have almost nothing to do with each other, elements of those stories come together in a new storyline that is The Hands of Ruin series.
The first and most obvious example of this is the introduction of Echo Valkzdokker in The Hands of Ruin: Book One. Echo was the main heroine of The Dean Machine, and The Hands of Ruin, in part, explains what happens to Echo after her departure from the hive. Her story is intertwined with the main characters of The Hands of Ruin and she has a prominent role in both Book One and Book Two. The second example is the mythology of the Everflame series living on in the land of Ferren, a place featured prominently in The Hands of Ruin. In fact, the four tribes of Ferren are named for characters that fans of the Everflame series are likely to recognize (Whiteclaw tribe, Zehnder tribe, Andor tribe, and Tiber tribe). Below is an excerpt from The Hands of Ruin: Book One that describes two characters walking into the Temple of Origin, a sacred place in Ferren that celebrates the past history of the Everflame series. • • • The men walked into an expansive entrance chamber, with glass windows in the ceiling that bathed an ornately sculpted fountain in sunlight. It looked as if the rays of the sun were sent down from the heavens for no other reason than to shine on the fountain. Endemall was not going to admit it, but Gildwyn had been right. The Temple of Origin was impressive, and he found himself closing his open jaw for fear of looking wonderstruck. “The fountain is sculpted in white stone and is hundreds of years old,” Gildwyn told Endemall as they walked through the main room. “I assume you recognize the likenesses of the Ancients.” Endemall nodded, still silent in a reverence he hadn’t anticipated. The great sculpture was beautiful, a statue of three of the four ancient creators of man. Tenturo the griffin and Bahknar the dragon were standing back to back, while the beautiful mermaid Chera sat at their side, delivering water into the fountain from her gracious hands. Endemall knew all these deities from the stories of his youth, but he had never been as mesmerized by them as he was now. However, the beauty of the fountain was nothing in comparison to the majesty of the gigantic mural painted on the far wall behind it. As the men passed the fountain and the sun’s rays now fell behind them, Endemall sighed audibly at the mural that extended up the entire thirty-foot height of the wall. “You weren’t kidding, were you, Nye?” Endemall was floored. “I assume you recognize the scene the mural depicts,” Gildwyn said. “Of course.” Endemall was like a child at the foot of his heroes. “That’s the moon god, Densa, in his battle against the Great Tyrant, and above them is the sun god, Evercloud. My father used to tell my brother and me that story of old Earth almost every night before we were sent to bed. It’s like that mural was painted right out of my imagination.” • • • The final example of how my stories come together in The Hands of Ruin might be the most exciting for fans of the Everflame series. I don’t want to give too much away, but in The Hands of Ruin: Book Two we see the return of a major character from Everflame. It may seem farfetched given the amount of time that has elapsed between Everflame and The Hands of Ruin, but keep in mind that Ferren is a place filled with a mystical substance called zulis that Masters wield in amazing ways. Zulis can be used for good, and it can be used for evil. It can be used to destroy, and it can be used to resurrect. Please check out The Hands of Ruin, and I hope you enjoy! The Hands of Ruin: Book One is available for FREE on kindle, nook, iBooks, and kobo The Hands of Ruin: Book Two is also available from the same retailers.  In The Hands of Ruin series, masters of the mystical substance zulis can bond with a jawhar. A jawhar is a spirit-like companion who bonds with a zul master through meditative use of zulis. To the unknowing, a jawhar can easily be mistaken for a common animal. Here’s an excerpt as example: “It’s not a dog,” Mitt said, straightening up and stepping away from his work at repairing a busted ale keg. “We’ve been over this.” “I don’t care what it is, Mitt.” Dell raised her thin eyebrows and pointed back out toward the dining room. “Jailhair, junehoard—whatever you called it, I want it gone. It’s ruining business.” Mitt sighed and rubbed the back of his neck. “It’s called a jawhar, Dell, and if you think I can get rid of it, you’ve lost your mind. I’ve got about as much control over that thing as I have over the sun. As I told you last time, send for Master Ah’Rhea. She’s the only one who can make it leave.” Few zul masters are skilled enough to have bonded with a jawhar. In fact, only four zul masters in all of Ferren have Jawhars. In the following excerpt, zul master Ah’Rhea Eneoh interacts with her Jawhar, Reego. The jawhar spun around and barked, obviously delighted with himself. He dipped his head back into the feffer fruit, and Ah’Rhea smiled. She popped a few ripe yellow berries into her mouth and shook her head. She would always have a soft spot for Reego. He was, after all, bonded to her for life. She sipped her wine and leaned back in her chair. There were only four zul masters in Ferren who had jawhars, and Reego was the only one who had manifested to look like a wild dog. Obviously, Ah’Rhea loved the form her jawhar had chosen. Reego knew her desires and preferences better than anyone ever had, or possibly ever would. The two shared a bond that transcended both mind and body in a way that was not easily defined. She watched as Reego enjoyed his fruit, wagging his bushy white-and-brown tail. His tall tufted ears brushed the edges of the bowl in a way that made Ah’Rhea smile. She leaned forward and petted the motley little fool while he ate. His fur was soft and light as it brushed against Ah’Rhea’s fingers, and the exercise of petting him added to her feeling of tranquility. Reego wasn’t a dog, but Ah’Rhea often treated him like one, and Reego didn’t seem to mind. If a stranger were to watch them now, he or she would see merely a thirty-pound wild dog with brown-and-white coloring, a flared, bushy tail, tufted ears, and shaggy paws. The only element of Reego’s appearance that set him apart from a normal wild dog was that he had allowed Ah’Rhea to braid the long hair under each of his tall ears and cinch a gold ringlet at the end of each braid. They slapped now against the bowl as he made for the berries at its bottom. Ah’Rhea drank from her cup and enjoyed the company of her best friend. The story of how she had bonded with Reego wasn’t especially exciting. It wasn’t a feat of dangerous adventure that allowed a zul master to bond with a jawhar but a feat of time, persistence, and self-discovery. Obviously, zulis was needed for the task, but a jawhar bonded to a zul master only in a moment of deep introspection and understanding. And here’s another excerpt further describing the bonding of a Jawhar to a zul master. Ah’Rhea remembered the moment Reego had finally come forward, the rain pounding her tiny little hut tucked into the humid mountains. She had recited the incantation over and over, whispering it so softly she could barely hear her own words. She had finally discovered the catalyst that had led her to the idea of becoming a zul master, that spark that had lit her mind when she first learned of the jawhars. It had been knowledge, the pursuit of knowing all things, that had brightened Ah’Rhea’s soul. But it was more than that. It was also the desire to have her knowledge carried forward through time so it may shape the future world and all within it. Her knowledge would be like a metaphysical entity rolling infinitely through time and space, gathering and increasing as it traveled, becoming capable of all possibility, capable of stimulating genesis. “Come now, my jawhar,” she had said. Her eyes had opened to the sound of something faintly sniffing the air. She had sat motionless as he stood before her, evaluating her, cautiously surveying all she was, with his back straight and his head low. In that moment, Ah’Rhea knew so much about him. She could feel it within like the beating of her very heart. His name was Reego, and he was the manifestation of Ah’Rhea’s soul. He was the piece of her that would live forever. Reego had moved forward, keeping his bright gaze fixed on her as she sat motionless, kneeling on the floor of the green hut. When he was so close that she could feel the gentle draft of his breath, she nodded at him slowly, and then he placed his head on her shoulder. Her jawhar had accepted her. Ah’Rhea Eneoh, zul master of Ferrenglyn, had bonded with her jawhar, and he would carry her soul forward into eternity. Click here to download The Hands of Ruin: Book One for kindle for FREE |
|||||
RSS Feed
